This is one looong post ...
It was Father's Day yesterday (Sunday) but it seemed like any other day to my dear hubby. Is it my imagination or is is true that Father's Day are less celebrated than Mother's Day?! I remember last month when Mother's Day was celebrated it was a big deal (to me, anyway). I mean it was only my 2nd Mother's Day, & since my son was too young the year before I felt this year was actually my first year celebrating a Mother's Day.
I asked my hubby - Do you know why Mother's Day is celebrated before Father's Day? Because Mums make more sacrifices : bearing baby for 9 months, giving birth (whether natural or C-section), breast-feeding, late night feeds, wiping poopy-dirty bottoms & washing vomit-stained clothes, settling colicky baby ... & when baby grows into toddler, calming the child when he's being clingy, wiping the boo-boo on the scrapped knee, holding child down when dentist needs to scrap off hardened plaque & many more interesting scenarios all mums have to grow through. Most Dads don't go through even half of what most Mums have to endeavour through but it I think it was wrong of me to label it so! So very wrong!
Yes, fathers aren't mothers but God made it so. Fathers aren't able to bear child nor give milk but they give support like holding the mother's hand when she's in pain through labour. He shed tears when he sees his wife cry in pain while trying to "cruise" another round of labour pains, he waits patiently whilst wife gets "chopped" up to get his first born out safely. He dutifully follows nurse to special care ward to sign papers & make sure baby is OK, whilst wife gets stitched & can't move for many hours after. He tirelessly goes up & down the wards to visit his newborn son in the special care ward & takes his son's first photos for his bed-ridden wife. He pushes his wife in a wheelchair, who can't really walk due to the Cesarean stitches, so that she can touch & see her son for the first times in 2 days. He drives down everyday (sometimes 2 or 3 times a day) when wife was discharged & in confinement, to visit his son who was still in the ward (even brings slow-walking wife that was supposed to be in confinement). He calls wards often to check on son's health even though he hates to "trouble" or bug people.
He cleans baby poop, bathes his 1 month old son, cuts his hair, carries the now toddler whenever he wants to be carried, wakes up for regular night feeds, brings his son out for bus rides & walks ... so that wife can take a breather sometimes!
As I will always joke, Steven can do almost anything that I, as Ryan's mum can do for him, except that he can't - give birth or breastfeed ... haha! Its true! Steven can do almost anything a new mum needs to do & I greatly appreciated his constant help during those early tough months. Maybe it was the baby blues & the colicky baby plus sheer exhaustion & lack of sleep that made me a grumpier than usual female, during those days. It didn't help that is took me a long while to get my stitches healed & not feel any pain when I moved (or sneezed or coughed). I was lucky that Steven pitched in so much to ease my baby "workload" & mummy responsibilities. He had a full-time job & came home late in the night but he never failed to help me out whenever he can, without complaint nor grumbles. I am really blessed!
Why am I putting all these down? Because I want to remind myself that I am one damn lucky woman. We may not be rich or have the luxury of overseas vacations, we may have simple meals & not able to splash on expensive gifts, we may have a tough time with finances & do cheap-or-free activities to spend our weekends but nothing is compared to love .... from the ones you love. Love can sometimes be in the form of a helping hand, when its so badly needed but its even more humbling when that helping hand comes without a word from the need-er but an automatic (voluntary) act that just blossoms out of nowhere. True sometimes the men in our lives need some nagging, prodding & "kicking" at times, but this hubby does it because he knows it makes his wife's life, just a lil bit easier. What more can you ask for?!
When I talk about hubby, its not as if he has no faults at all, on the contrary ... sometimes he makes me soo upset or irritates me to bits but they are few & far between. Compared to a lot of husbands out there, I am one lucky wife. So I put these down to always remind myself that I should give him a break sometimes, for floundering or making silly mistakes or out-of-whacked decisions. There are times his outlook may seem too radical or loopy but who am I to say that I am always right. Sometimes, I must learn to bite my tongue & keep my opinionated views to myself. Sometimes its nice just to be able to hear his thoughts, even though they (at times) clash with mine. My husband is not perfect but so am I. He comes with all the good & bad & his best ever "flaw", in my view is loving ... & accepting me, with my warts & all. I love you hubby ... & Happy Father's Day!
OK, on with the day's activities ...
Hubby had promised to take juniour kite flying recently so today was the day it happened. We were supposed to bring my parents out in the morning but it got pushed to a later time slot, after lunch. As we left the new kite in the car, hubby decided to find a good spot to park the car, beside an open field & make his lil boy happy. As you can see from the pics, it was sweltering hot when we started. The photos kinda looked washed out - that was actually the sun's rays. The three of us were sweating buckets by the time we left the field. Not surprisingly, Ryan protested & teared when we told him it was time to leave. Daddy was exhausted running after the kite & Mummy had enough of the heat! We promised him that we will go kite flying again soon.
After kite flying, we still had some time to kill before we had to pick my parents & niece up for the outing. So hubby said - Lets go to the Army Museum. Ermm ... huh? ok ... I guess. I wasn't that keen (as you can tell) but I was happy to oblige if hubby was keen to drive all the way to Jurong. The Army museum was in the same vicinity as The Singapore Discovery Centre (which we went once, many eons ago with Steve's brother, Pete). Don't know why hubby always keep mentioning this place as if it was such a gem but haha ... I was willing to go wherever he takes me.
Father & son posed in front of the water feature/pond.
Ryan sitting in the army rover, that was part of a group of vehicles behind the museum.
Daddy posing with his lil boy, the driver!
Tanks!
Standing tall-er than Daddy!
More vehicle exhibits!
They had an area that was a "mock-up" obstacle course, that most military personnel had to go through as part of their training to becoming full pledged soldiers. My son enjoyed this part most of all. Daddy said rather amusingly that Ryan will get to "taste" the real thing when he's at a ripe ol age of eighteen. Haha ... when Ryan finally enlists for National Service, I don't think he will enjoy it so much! But as most mothers of young male Singaporeans, I wish he won't have such a tough time when his time comes to serve his country but I know it will be a good experience for him.
Holding his dear son's hand!
A back view ... of my two favourite boys!When we finally took my parents out after lunch, we went for some spot of shopping in the surburbs. Here are the two kids, Ryan & his cousin, Ayra running around in circles. Ok ... Ryan was doing most of the running & Ayra was just hanging on for dear life (poor girl). I think sometimes Ryan is much too active for his own good. I don't know where he gets his energy. For a kid that doesn't eat much, he sure has a lot of energy to burn. Hhhmm ... maybe thats why he can't get fat, he burns so much calories ... just being himself.
After these pics were taken, we didn't head home yet, as my mum wasn't finished shopping. She declared that she wanted to go to Toa Payoh (huh? really?) to look for some stuff for my nephew. So off we went ... & after walking, shopping, a short detour to the comforts of the air-conditioned foodcourt to have some cold deseerts & light meals, we headed our way home. By then, my boy was dead tired & sure enough, he dozed off in the car during our trip back home.
Well, that was how Father's Day was spent this year. No cakes, no makan session, not much gifts either but I hope we made the two daddies - my hubby & my dad, happy with our simple outings. Maybe next year we can do something more interesting ... or maybe its not what you do that matters, its who you spend the day with thats more important.
Happy Father's Day to one & all !!!
